When I was a 16-year-old high school senior, a leader in our church who was in his early to mid twenties announced at a church meeting that God had revealed to him that the next woman he dated would end up being his wife. Later that night, he asked me to a Lisa Loeb concert (any other 90s teens feeling this?) and while she was an absolute favorite of mine, especially since I was an angsty singer-songwriter myself, I declined with a feeling of horror in my heart. Why? Well, because I didn’t know if God really had given him this message, which meant I had no idea whether I was actually going to be “forced” to marry this man I had zero feelings for, due to God’s will. (Hey, I was a teen, and we don’t always think rationally, mmkay?)
This isn’t an isolated incident either. I mean, this was the only time I was asked out by someone who declared such a statement (thank you, Lord), but I’m sure I’m not the only one who has been at the opposite end of a “God told me…” statement that left you feeling icky.
So, what does this mean? Does God speak to us today? Does God have a will for our lives? I believe He absolutely does, but just because we feel strong emotions about something or someone, like say…an irrational crush, doesn’t mean that God is telling us that His will is for us to be with that person (otherwise I’d be married to Dean Cain right now…just saying…)
So, how do we determine God’s will for our lives?
Want the simple answer?
There is no simple answer.
Sorry, I know that was rude, but you set yourself up for it!
There are ways to determine God’s will for our lives though, even if it’s not always simple to discern, and in order to understand this principle, we need to look to Scripture.
What if I don’t believe God has a will for my life?
On the other side of the spectrum are those who believe that God does not have a specific will for our lives. I remember talking on the phone one night as a young adult to a dreamy guy I’d met in Nashville. He told me that he didn’t believe that God cared about who you ended up with, or what you ended up doing in your life. Wait, what? I couldn’t believe this beautiful Bible-believing boy would say such a thing. This was a record scratch moment, a nails on the chalkboard of life moment for me…God doesn’t care? I thought…How could that be? And, since this dude was a little older, a little wiser, (and did I mention dreamy) I believed him and started down a path of believing that God didn’t care about what I did, or who I married (spoiler alert: He actually does).
There is a balance between believing every little thing that happens to us is a sign of God’s will for our lives, and believing that God takes a “set it and forget it” approach to us after creation. The fact is, Scripture tells us that he cares deeply about the decisions we make, and that he does have a plan for our lives (and nooooo, it’s not the “wonderful plan” that the prosperity punks would have you believe).
Together, over the next few weeks, we’ll unpack this idea of God’s will. We’ll look at what Scripture tells us (in context of course), and how we can deal with those gray areas where we aren’t sure what to do.
In the meantime, if you have any specific questions about God’s will, please leave them in the comments or send me a message and I’ll try to cover them as we go through this series!
Hi, I'm Melie.
If you've landed on one of my posts it's probably because you're either divorced, trying to navigate this new world of dating, grieving, or all of the above. Welcome to the club!
Life hasn't turned out the way I thought it would, that's for sure!
Maybe you feel the same way…
You thought life was going to be a beautiful fairy tale..but it’s a hot mess express instead.
Maybe you’re heartbroken, let down, or just have questions (like "What the h-e-double-hockey-sticks happened to my life?!")
Or maybe you’re so fed up with "surprises" in life that you’ve become numb to the faith that used to inspire you.
If so, you’re in the right place.
